Happy One Year Out Of The Closet!
Well we celebrate coming out of a womb (ewww) so I just thought I would celebrate coming out of the closet! It really doesn't feel like it has been a year since the car crash, but then again it seems like over a year ago. The past year has been a complete change in lifestyle for me, not only because I am 'out' and don't have to hide who I am any more, but I moved to Scotland and lived by myself for a year at uni. Living away from home really gave me a chance to learn more about myself and actually be who I am with out having to hide it from my parents. I dunno it was just nice to go on dates and have guys round without making up a million excuses to my family as to where I was going and who I was with. Once I came out I never had the best relationship with my family.
At first I blamed them and said it was all there fault. I blamed them for me having to always lie to them. I blamed them for never telling them. I blamed them for hating them so much. Over the past year I have realised that, no, it wasn't all their fault. I was a horrible son to them. I always started arguments, I never let them into my life and I tried to shift any blame to them. Now I think my mum and I have realised that we have both made mistakes and both where to blame at times. The relationship with my mother is better now and I am so thankful for that.
26th June 2010
I had been going out with my boyfriend for one month. So we decided to go for a drive up the mountains and go for a walk. Of course I had told my mother I was only 5 minutes down the road at my friends house. Well anyway we got the mountain and it was kind of boring so decided we wanted to do something else. Both being as indecisive as the other we decided to play Rock Scissors Paper to see what we would do. After 'A drive to Newcastle' won, my boyfriend said "It was Fate" and away we went.
So anyway off we went on our drive. It was the Lisburn Fun Run so I couldn't go back into the town to go that way so I had to take a different route. I had never drove down that road before so was a bit cautious when I was driving. After all how could I explain a car crash in the middle of nowhere with a boy my mother had never heard about when I supposed to be 5 minutes down the road at a friends? Eventually we got onto the road I originally wanted to be on so I was a wee bit more confident and kept on driving.
We stopped off at a Garage half way there. This is the 'infamous' garage I always made my family stop off at because it made the most amazing ice cream ever. I don't think we got ice cream I can't really remember but we got something to snack on anyway. We stayed in the car for a bit while we ate and then off we went again.
After this stop there are few very large 'S bends' in the road, it was round the last that the crash happened. It is still a bit of a blur to me all I can remember is that I lost control of the car (possibly from hitting a pothole) mounted the curb and slid down the grass.
Great I had crashed my mothers car, for the second time in two weeks, a half an hour drive away from home, when I was supposed to be 5 minutes away, with my boyfriend, when my mother never even knew I was gay. I had NO idea how to get out of this one.
The two left wheels where completely wrecked, they where slashed on impact with the curb, there was no way I was getting that car home. I remember bursting into tears, the only thing I could was phone my mum and tell her everything. So I did. The only thing I remember from that conversation was my mum saying 'you are fucking where?' when I told her where I was and 'you are with fucking who?' when I told her I was with my boyfriend. I cried for a good ten minutes not knowing what was going to happen. The only thing I could think of doing was phoning my assistant head of year and telling her what happened. She calmed me down and made sure that I knew everything was going to be all right. She later told me that she had been drinking that night but was about to phone a taxi to come and get me. I love her so much, she really was the rock that I needed during everything.
So then the family arrived, mum, dad and sister. As soon as my mum saw she began screaming and I began crying. My dad never spoke to me. While my sister just gave me a look that said 'you have really done it this time'. I hated every second of that night it is mostly a blur right now I just remember a lot of screaming and a lot of crying. The only thing that kept me going was knowing that my teacher was on the other end of the phone and that my boyfriend was by my side holding my hand.
He did a lot for me that night without even knowing it. I know it sounds silly but if he wasn't there things would have been so different. I don't mean it wouldn't have happened. I mean if I didn't have his support I don't know what I would have done.
The car journey home was horrible. Half an hour of complete silence. No radio, not nothing. I tried so hard not to cry. I folded my arms so I could grab hold of my boyfriends hand without my mother noticing. Once we got home my sister brought him home and I went to have a conversation with my mum and dad.
I am not sure what angered them more. The fact that I was gay, the fact I was gay but never told them, or the fact that for the past few months I had lied to them every week about where I was going and who I was seeing.
Two days later I had my first Politics A-level. Two days after that I had my last exam. My friend dropped me off home after a McDonalds lunch, I got in got changed went outside into the sun with my laptop and a bottle of WKD to celebrate the end of my High School Life. I signed onto msn and up popped my boyfriend on chat. "I don't think we should go out any more" My heart sank. I literally went from the top of the world to nothing. We argued over msn and then I just burst into tears and rang my friend. She came back and looked after me.
At the time I needed him the most he deserted me, to be honest I don't think I will ever forgive him for that. We still speak, occasionally, but always end up arguing over something and don't speak for a few months. The next few weeks where the worst I had ever experienced. Not only had I lost a boyfriend, but I had lost the trust of my family. This is when the hate began. This is where it all went wrong.
Looking back I could have handled the whole situation better. But I suppose the whole experience has made me grow as a person. In a way I am kind of lucky. I now have a better relationship with my family and have a more mature few point in things.
My coming out story is a little bit different than your usual story. I guess nothing can ever be normal with me...
One thing my boyfriend said was true though... it was fate after all...
Sunday, 26 June 2011
Monday, 13 June 2011
The Customer is Never Right
I am sorry but customers are idiots, actually the thing I hate most about my job is the customers. I work as a checkout operator in a local Supermarket. I love it. All I do is stand by my till all day scanning items, doing lottery tickets, selling gas and electricity and handing out cigarettes and alcohol to anyone who shows me a valid ID. The people I work with are amazing, we laugh, we gossip and genuinely have a good time. The only thing that makes me dread going to work every day are the customers.
Sure some of them are lovely. I have a nice time chatting to elderly women, hearing about their day, laughing at cute babies and asking their mothers how old they are, chatting to friends and neighbours who come by to buy a litre of milk but the most enjoyable past time in work, checking out all the hot guys who pass through that door. Sadly none of them, gay or otherwise, give me a second look, but still it is nice to look. It is these rare few times that I like customers. But I must stress the word rare.
The customer is always right. Well pardon my French but by hell they are. In my short while working numerous jobs I can tell you 9 times out of 10 the customer is not right but you being the great employee you are have to tell them they are because it is all about customer satisfaction. Maybe if a customer actually read the tag correctly they would see it is marked as '£1 off' and not as they so hoped marked '£9 off'. Or if the customer took the time to read the coupon they would realise that you cannot use it unless you spend over £40 or that the offer doesn't even start until next week. But, because the customer is always right, we have to abide by their demands, for fear of losing customers.
This really annoys me, customers basically rob the shop because owners fear they are going to lose one measly customer who only comes in to buy the Sunday newspaper ever other week but who happened to make up some offer in his head this time. So while this customer gets the item for £1 instead of £1 off, I then get shouted at because the next day my till is £2.45 short. If owners spent more time worrying about giving customers free stuff and less time putting employees on final warnings for the stupidest of stuff they would have a better work environment. Happy workers are the key to a healthy business not rip-off customers.
Yes I may be jealous because my customers get treated better than I do but I am sorry if I wish I had more respect from my boss. The job which I currently have I started in September 2009 and that Christmas decided to go to the work Christmas dinner with my sister as she had worked in the same place for a number of years. However on this particular occasion by boss, who I had worked for four months for, thought I was a waiter and demanded to see my manager because the table next to us was throwing food. How I so wanted to tell him that he was sitting beside my manager but I was far too embarrassed and ashamed that my own boss never knew who I was. But I soon realised I had nothing to be ashamed of, he did, how can a Business Owner claim he runs a successful business when he doesn't even recognise the face of his own staff?
Fair enough the man owns three stores, but that is no excuse. He had obviously seen me in the shop after I had served him and his wife on numerous occasions. One of his assistant managers is my sister so I would be assuming he would know her brother worked for him. He had shook my hand earlier that evening as we waited for the bus to arrive to pick us up. Was he really so blind that he never remembered my face? Does he see every employee as hamsters to his money making machine? I don't know but what I do know is that a company should learn to understand that to stop it from falling apart is to look after its employees a little bit better.
The customer is not always right. The employee is not always right. And the owner definitely isn't always right. Me however? I try to be right all of the time and when I am not I will scream until you admit that I am ^.^
Sure some of them are lovely. I have a nice time chatting to elderly women, hearing about their day, laughing at cute babies and asking their mothers how old they are, chatting to friends and neighbours who come by to buy a litre of milk but the most enjoyable past time in work, checking out all the hot guys who pass through that door. Sadly none of them, gay or otherwise, give me a second look, but still it is nice to look. It is these rare few times that I like customers. But I must stress the word rare.
The customer is always right. Well pardon my French but by hell they are. In my short while working numerous jobs I can tell you 9 times out of 10 the customer is not right but you being the great employee you are have to tell them they are because it is all about customer satisfaction. Maybe if a customer actually read the tag correctly they would see it is marked as '£1 off' and not as they so hoped marked '£9 off'. Or if the customer took the time to read the coupon they would realise that you cannot use it unless you spend over £40 or that the offer doesn't even start until next week. But, because the customer is always right, we have to abide by their demands, for fear of losing customers.
This really annoys me, customers basically rob the shop because owners fear they are going to lose one measly customer who only comes in to buy the Sunday newspaper ever other week but who happened to make up some offer in his head this time. So while this customer gets the item for £1 instead of £1 off, I then get shouted at because the next day my till is £2.45 short. If owners spent more time worrying about giving customers free stuff and less time putting employees on final warnings for the stupidest of stuff they would have a better work environment. Happy workers are the key to a healthy business not rip-off customers.
Yes I may be jealous because my customers get treated better than I do but I am sorry if I wish I had more respect from my boss. The job which I currently have I started in September 2009 and that Christmas decided to go to the work Christmas dinner with my sister as she had worked in the same place for a number of years. However on this particular occasion by boss, who I had worked for four months for, thought I was a waiter and demanded to see my manager because the table next to us was throwing food. How I so wanted to tell him that he was sitting beside my manager but I was far too embarrassed and ashamed that my own boss never knew who I was. But I soon realised I had nothing to be ashamed of, he did, how can a Business Owner claim he runs a successful business when he doesn't even recognise the face of his own staff?
Fair enough the man owns three stores, but that is no excuse. He had obviously seen me in the shop after I had served him and his wife on numerous occasions. One of his assistant managers is my sister so I would be assuming he would know her brother worked for him. He had shook my hand earlier that evening as we waited for the bus to arrive to pick us up. Was he really so blind that he never remembered my face? Does he see every employee as hamsters to his money making machine? I don't know but what I do know is that a company should learn to understand that to stop it from falling apart is to look after its employees a little bit better.
The customer is not always right. The employee is not always right. And the owner definitely isn't always right. Me however? I try to be right all of the time and when I am not I will scream until you admit that I am ^.^
Friday, 3 June 2011
Gays are too Gay
Yes I am a homosexual, but I am not under any circumstances 'gay'. I hate being labelled. I hate being introduced as 'the gay friend'. I hate how my sexuality seems to be how people describe me. Fair enough, I am pretty camp, but that is because of who I am, not what I am. There is so much more to me than just being gay.
You know this list goes on and on. I may be sexually attracted to guys but that does not make me part of some 'community' or automatically fit into some sort of stereotype. Sure I may fit into some of these stereotypes, but so what? I don't introduce some people as my 'straight friend', automatically assume that they are a sports fanatic or even fancy every girl that has ever walked the earth. Sure I may talk about guys a lot, but last time I checked straight people talk about the opposite sex a lot as well. It just annoys me that people think they automatically know who I am and everything about me because I am gay. Well I'm sorry but no you don't. Most people are surprised to find out that I am obsessed with Black Ops. Why should you be surprised? It isn't like it is a straight only game.
What makes this all worse though is people who I like to call 'Gay gays'. These are the people who constantly like to remind others they are gay, put all over their twitter that they are gay, are always talking about how discriminated against they are, trying to play the 'gay card' when life doesn't go their way. Well I am sorry, but the person who fell out with you, didn't do so because you gay, they did it because you are not a very nice person to hang about with, you didn't get that job because the employer was homophobic, you didn't get it because the person who got it was just more qualified than you and for goodness sake people don't call you a slut because you are gay, they call you one because you have sex with every guy you come across.
Some gay people need to stop being 'Gay' and start being who they are. It really bugs me when people try and revolve their whole life around their sexuality, there is so much more to a person than their sexuality and if people ever want to cut out homophobia they need to realise that being gay isn't everything.
Before I continue I would like to point out that this is not a blog giving off at or separating 'queens' or 'straight acting' people as that is another argument all together. Both 'types' of gays are guilty of this. I myself have been guilty of this as some of my friends like to point out to me when I go off on this rant.
But. Back to the main point. Some gay people spend too much time stereotyping themselves and constantly reminding people that they are gay that they further separate themselves from everyone else. In my opinion fighting for Gay Rights is about both 'communities' coming together and showing people that we are the same whether we are gay, straight, lesbian, transgender or whatever. I just wish people would stop making it worse for themselves.
Yes I do think that some people make it worse for themselves. Fighting for gay rights is something that I have done in the past and will continue to do in some situations where I feel that my voice should be heard. Those people who fight for such rights are an admiration to me that they stand up there and fight for these things. But they are not fighting for your rights so that you can constantly make yourself different and constantly try to feel discriminated against. Yes there are some occasions where gay people are discriminated against which is wrong, but that does not give anyone the right to say they always are. In fact sometimes I feel like when some people play the 'gay card' they are spitting in the faces of the people who stand up for the rights of homosexual people.
Right so this blog has been a bit all over the place but I would just like to sum up my argument, if possible. Basically I believe that some gay people should stop focussing on how different they are to everyone else and start realising that everybody is all the same no matter what their sexuality. People, both straight and gay, need to realise that nobody should be described by their sexuality. The gender of person who you want to share a bed with does not dictate who you are, it is how you treat that person and everyone else around you which dictates who you are. So stop trying to be 'Gay' and start being yourself and you will find that those rights you want and deserve are within all of our grasps.
I study History and Politics.
I want to be the Prime Minister one day.
If I do not get into politics I want to become a teacher.
I enjoy writing and often write poetry.
My favourite colour is blue.
I like to sleep with my teddy.
My nickname is Nando.
I love Glee.
You know this list goes on and on. I may be sexually attracted to guys but that does not make me part of some 'community' or automatically fit into some sort of stereotype. Sure I may fit into some of these stereotypes, but so what? I don't introduce some people as my 'straight friend', automatically assume that they are a sports fanatic or even fancy every girl that has ever walked the earth. Sure I may talk about guys a lot, but last time I checked straight people talk about the opposite sex a lot as well. It just annoys me that people think they automatically know who I am and everything about me because I am gay. Well I'm sorry but no you don't. Most people are surprised to find out that I am obsessed with Black Ops. Why should you be surprised? It isn't like it is a straight only game.
What makes this all worse though is people who I like to call 'Gay gays'. These are the people who constantly like to remind others they are gay, put all over their twitter that they are gay, are always talking about how discriminated against they are, trying to play the 'gay card' when life doesn't go their way. Well I am sorry, but the person who fell out with you, didn't do so because you gay, they did it because you are not a very nice person to hang about with, you didn't get that job because the employer was homophobic, you didn't get it because the person who got it was just more qualified than you and for goodness sake people don't call you a slut because you are gay, they call you one because you have sex with every guy you come across.
Some gay people need to stop being 'Gay' and start being who they are. It really bugs me when people try and revolve their whole life around their sexuality, there is so much more to a person than their sexuality and if people ever want to cut out homophobia they need to realise that being gay isn't everything.
Before I continue I would like to point out that this is not a blog giving off at or separating 'queens' or 'straight acting' people as that is another argument all together. Both 'types' of gays are guilty of this. I myself have been guilty of this as some of my friends like to point out to me when I go off on this rant.
But. Back to the main point. Some gay people spend too much time stereotyping themselves and constantly reminding people that they are gay that they further separate themselves from everyone else. In my opinion fighting for Gay Rights is about both 'communities' coming together and showing people that we are the same whether we are gay, straight, lesbian, transgender or whatever. I just wish people would stop making it worse for themselves.
Yes I do think that some people make it worse for themselves. Fighting for gay rights is something that I have done in the past and will continue to do in some situations where I feel that my voice should be heard. Those people who fight for such rights are an admiration to me that they stand up there and fight for these things. But they are not fighting for your rights so that you can constantly make yourself different and constantly try to feel discriminated against. Yes there are some occasions where gay people are discriminated against which is wrong, but that does not give anyone the right to say they always are. In fact sometimes I feel like when some people play the 'gay card' they are spitting in the faces of the people who stand up for the rights of homosexual people.
Right so this blog has been a bit all over the place but I would just like to sum up my argument, if possible. Basically I believe that some gay people should stop focussing on how different they are to everyone else and start realising that everybody is all the same no matter what their sexuality. People, both straight and gay, need to realise that nobody should be described by their sexuality. The gender of person who you want to share a bed with does not dictate who you are, it is how you treat that person and everyone else around you which dictates who you are. So stop trying to be 'Gay' and start being yourself and you will find that those rights you want and deserve are within all of our grasps.
Tuesday, 24 May 2011
Geddes Court - The Ghetto
Well that is it, my last exam of the academic year is finally over. This is where Summer 2011 begins for me and where First Year of University ends. It has been a long, tiring, enjoyable, amazing, best and worst year of my life. This is a journey most of us have already taken or are soon to take, there are a lot of things I would change if I could go back, but if I did, would I have learnt everything I now know? Would I be the person I am today? Would I be any happier?
September 11th. This day will forever stick in my head, not the day in 2001 but the day in 2010. This was the day I became independent. This was the day I finally moved out of my parents house and moved into First Year Halls. I still remember the first time I walked into Geddes Court, the first time I saw my future best friend, the first thing Rachel Moss, my future 'Fag Hag', ever said to me, the first time I thought 'Wow this carpet is horrendous' but most importantly I remember the first time I ever saw my father cry.
Not only was this one of the most amazing days in my life it was also going to be very challenging day. I had to leave the house that I had grew up in for 18 years, the family that became friends, the street that became a neighbourhood, the High School that became a family, the work that became a social life, the friends that became my life, the town that became a city, I had to leave home. I remember the week before I left, it was filled with tears and sorrow but also of hope for the future and the many times I said 'Don't worry I will see you at Christmas'. Leaving home was the hardest thing I have ever done.
How could a building that was built on designs of a Swedish Prison become my new home? How could this city ever compare to the one I grew up in? How was I going to live in such a tiny room? How was I going to share a bathroom, a kitchen and a shower with 17 other people? I never knew how I ever coped with any of this but I did and I loved it.
I have lost count of the times I have sat and cried in my room and wanted nothing more than to go home and to sleep in my own bed and hug my mother. Since coming here in September I have been home twice and at times I wished it was more. But at the same time I wish it was less, at Christmas I made my mum bring me back early because I missed the place so much.
I will admit some of the people in this building drive me to insanity and I would happily never speak to some of them ever again. Others I hope to never lose touch with and I hope they will be a huge part of my life for years to come. And the rest? Sadly I never got the pleasure to meet them, but there is still three years left to meet them. Eventually Geddes didn't just become 'that building where I live' it soon became 'home' and so did everyone in it, even the ones I did hate. Yes I never got off to the best of starts with people and there are still a few I will never get on well with but that is all part of the 'Ghetto Life'. Living here has been one of the most amazing experiences of my life but like that first day it was one of the most challenging experiences I have had to deal with.
Leaving Geddes is a very Bitter/Sweet moment for me; I cannot wait for the life of me to get home have a nice hot bath, annoy my mother as to what she is making for dinner and just get away from every single one of them for three months, I will miss every single one of them, my best friends, the people I hate and even those I never got to love or hate, I will truly miss them all.
Now before I start to cry any more as I write this I will leave the people of Geddes (and anyone else reading) with two things. First of all the best of luck to everyone in their exams and I hope you all have an amazing summer and I am sure I will see you all walking about uni next year looking just as lost and confused as we did this year, and finally these lyrics which just seem to capture that bitter/sweet feeling, but also, with a sense of hope for the future added in.
This not the end, it is only the beginning of a whole new life.
September 11th. This day will forever stick in my head, not the day in 2001 but the day in 2010. This was the day I became independent. This was the day I finally moved out of my parents house and moved into First Year Halls. I still remember the first time I walked into Geddes Court, the first time I saw my future best friend, the first thing Rachel Moss, my future 'Fag Hag', ever said to me, the first time I thought 'Wow this carpet is horrendous' but most importantly I remember the first time I ever saw my father cry.
Not only was this one of the most amazing days in my life it was also going to be very challenging day. I had to leave the house that I had grew up in for 18 years, the family that became friends, the street that became a neighbourhood, the High School that became a family, the work that became a social life, the friends that became my life, the town that became a city, I had to leave home. I remember the week before I left, it was filled with tears and sorrow but also of hope for the future and the many times I said 'Don't worry I will see you at Christmas'. Leaving home was the hardest thing I have ever done.
How could a building that was built on designs of a Swedish Prison become my new home? How could this city ever compare to the one I grew up in? How was I going to live in such a tiny room? How was I going to share a bathroom, a kitchen and a shower with 17 other people? I never knew how I ever coped with any of this but I did and I loved it.
I have lost count of the times I have sat and cried in my room and wanted nothing more than to go home and to sleep in my own bed and hug my mother. Since coming here in September I have been home twice and at times I wished it was more. But at the same time I wish it was less, at Christmas I made my mum bring me back early because I missed the place so much.
I will admit some of the people in this building drive me to insanity and I would happily never speak to some of them ever again. Others I hope to never lose touch with and I hope they will be a huge part of my life for years to come. And the rest? Sadly I never got the pleasure to meet them, but there is still three years left to meet them. Eventually Geddes didn't just become 'that building where I live' it soon became 'home' and so did everyone in it, even the ones I did hate. Yes I never got off to the best of starts with people and there are still a few I will never get on well with but that is all part of the 'Ghetto Life'. Living here has been one of the most amazing experiences of my life but like that first day it was one of the most challenging experiences I have had to deal with.
Leaving Geddes is a very Bitter/Sweet moment for me; I cannot wait for the life of me to get home have a nice hot bath, annoy my mother as to what she is making for dinner and just get away from every single one of them for three months, I will miss every single one of them, my best friends, the people I hate and even those I never got to love or hate, I will truly miss them all.
Now before I start to cry any more as I write this I will leave the people of Geddes (and anyone else reading) with two things. First of all the best of luck to everyone in their exams and I hope you all have an amazing summer and I am sure I will see you all walking about uni next year looking just as lost and confused as we did this year, and finally these lyrics which just seem to capture that bitter/sweet feeling, but also, with a sense of hope for the future added in.
Been a long day, on my way
To my holy place to pray
Give thanks for every blessing given to me
I know there's more to see, more to me
No more living in misery
'Cause this is how I visioned life to be
Searched high and low, so close yet so far to go
I just know there's a sunny day
Who'd ever thought that I would see this day
Where I would see my ghetto life fade away
'Cause I was lost and couldn't find a way
And now I look forward to every day
Welcome to my sunny day!
This not the end, it is only the beginning of a whole new life.
Friday, 20 May 2011
Friendships shorter than a Tweet
There is the good old saying that 'Facebook is for the friends you hate and Twitter is for the friends you don't know'. I suppose this is true as a very limited number of my followers I actually know in real life and in fact have never met someone in real life who I previously knew from Twitter. Personally, I am not a big fan of having my friends on my Twitter because I usually want to bitch about them, mainly people who I live with or dick heads who appear on my News Feed on Facebook, but as more and more people I know start to follow me this becomes more and more difficult. My life just gets too stressful when I do not have a means to vent my anger at people who neither know what I am talking about or probably even care.
However in saying this, you do get the odd person on Twitter who does care, first of all you start '@replying' them, then over a space of time it moves onto 'Direct Messaging' and will then usually end up in adding them on Facebook, Skype or MSN. It is these Tweeters which bring me back to Twitter time and time again. It is these few people who make me check my Replies or who make me read my timeline rather than just post a tweet and leave. It is these people who make me enjoy my time on Twitter. Sadly most of these eventually drift away and you lose touch with them and in some cases don't speak to them for months on end.
Sometimes I forget that people on Twitter actually have social lives, you know, real friends, work, school or just in general an actual life outside of Twitter. I don't know I am just getting sick of having friendships on Twitter which are shorter than a Tweet it self. Twitter has moved from being for the 'friends you don't know' to a bunch of people who 'used to be friends but no longer remember you'. Do not get me wrong, I have fallen to the social awkwardness of 'I can't remember telling you that' before, but it seems to happen to me a lot more than me forgetting the person.
Although I was talking to my friend about this today, I seem to remember stuff more than other people. I will be talking to someone and more often than not they will say 'I can't remember telling you that' or something to that effect. I guess the fact that I remember some things that others don't upsets me, it just makes me feel that they have made a bigger impact in my life than I have in their's. I suppose that his just shows a Human Nature of wanting to be recognised and noticed in life.
Everyone who has ever posted a Facebook status, tweeted, logged into Foursquare or wrote a blog is attention seeking. Everyone, myself included, is looking for a response from someone, we all just want some reignition in this world filled with celebrities and fame. What is stopping us from achieving this? The only way a 'normal' person can get themselves out their is from the ever growing forum that is the internet. Singers, writers, comedians are constantly found on on YouTube and the likes, look at Britain's Got Talent and X Factor they have even started taking auditions from YouTube.
Because of this we are haunted by the fear of not being noticed. Why am I not getting views on my YouTube video? Why has nobody liked my Facebook status? Why did nobody retweet that? That is not a way I want to live my life, with the constant self doubt of not being cared about or not being as popular or as funny as someone else. Why should I have to live like that? I am decent enough guy, I have good friends, I have plenty of enemies, but everyone does. I want to be able to come online and write blogs or tweet because I want to, not to please someone else. I just hope one day I can 100% tell myself that this is true. Can you?
What has the internet turned us into? We have shorter attention spans, adverts on TV have had to be shortened, to give us more variety and more concise information for a market who want's choice and lots of it. If we condense our life into 140 characters, where does that leave us? We get bored of friendships that arn't going anywhere, we need that constant attention from someone. And relationships? They have become even worse, we can't settle down, we need drama, we can no longer allow our lives to be boring. Why should we settle for a life where everything is always the same when we can go online and find millions of different things to entertain us?
I am in no way going to deny that any of this applies to me, because most of it does. Nor am I saying that any of this is right, I do not like my life being like this but sometimes I just feel like I am trapped in a vicious circle. Obviously this is not the way anyone should lead their life but all of us will do it in some way or other whether it have a huge effect or just small one.
However in saying this, you do get the odd person on Twitter who does care, first of all you start '@replying' them, then over a space of time it moves onto 'Direct Messaging' and will then usually end up in adding them on Facebook, Skype or MSN. It is these Tweeters which bring me back to Twitter time and time again. It is these few people who make me check my Replies or who make me read my timeline rather than just post a tweet and leave. It is these people who make me enjoy my time on Twitter. Sadly most of these eventually drift away and you lose touch with them and in some cases don't speak to them for months on end.
Sometimes I forget that people on Twitter actually have social lives, you know, real friends, work, school or just in general an actual life outside of Twitter. I don't know I am just getting sick of having friendships on Twitter which are shorter than a Tweet it self. Twitter has moved from being for the 'friends you don't know' to a bunch of people who 'used to be friends but no longer remember you'. Do not get me wrong, I have fallen to the social awkwardness of 'I can't remember telling you that' before, but it seems to happen to me a lot more than me forgetting the person.
Although I was talking to my friend about this today, I seem to remember stuff more than other people. I will be talking to someone and more often than not they will say 'I can't remember telling you that' or something to that effect. I guess the fact that I remember some things that others don't upsets me, it just makes me feel that they have made a bigger impact in my life than I have in their's. I suppose that his just shows a Human Nature of wanting to be recognised and noticed in life.
Everyone who has ever posted a Facebook status, tweeted, logged into Foursquare or wrote a blog is attention seeking. Everyone, myself included, is looking for a response from someone, we all just want some reignition in this world filled with celebrities and fame. What is stopping us from achieving this? The only way a 'normal' person can get themselves out their is from the ever growing forum that is the internet. Singers, writers, comedians are constantly found on on YouTube and the likes, look at Britain's Got Talent and X Factor they have even started taking auditions from YouTube.
Because of this we are haunted by the fear of not being noticed. Why am I not getting views on my YouTube video? Why has nobody liked my Facebook status? Why did nobody retweet that? That is not a way I want to live my life, with the constant self doubt of not being cared about or not being as popular or as funny as someone else. Why should I have to live like that? I am decent enough guy, I have good friends, I have plenty of enemies, but everyone does. I want to be able to come online and write blogs or tweet because I want to, not to please someone else. I just hope one day I can 100% tell myself that this is true. Can you?
What has the internet turned us into? We have shorter attention spans, adverts on TV have had to be shortened, to give us more variety and more concise information for a market who want's choice and lots of it. If we condense our life into 140 characters, where does that leave us? We get bored of friendships that arn't going anywhere, we need that constant attention from someone. And relationships? They have become even worse, we can't settle down, we need drama, we can no longer allow our lives to be boring. Why should we settle for a life where everything is always the same when we can go online and find millions of different things to entertain us?
I am in no way going to deny that any of this applies to me, because most of it does. Nor am I saying that any of this is right, I do not like my life being like this but sometimes I just feel like I am trapped in a vicious circle. Obviously this is not the way anyone should lead their life but all of us will do it in some way or other whether it have a huge effect or just small one.
Monday, 9 May 2011
Scottish Independence: Part 1 An Overview
So, SNP have grasped power in the Scottish Parliament, and now once agian the debate of Scottish Independency is back in the forefront of peoples minds. Is independency viable? Is it better for Scotland? Will it happen? Should it happen? In my opinion the answer to all these questions is 'NO' and that is what I will mark on a referendum if one ever comes to light.
I don't want an Independent Scotland and most likely you are not going to want it either. In a recent survey done, 58% of the people would like a referendum to be held, this sounds promising to any YES campaign, but only on the surface. Only 38% of the people of those people actually want independence with a majority of 54% stating they would rather stay part of the United Kingdom. So it is more likely that people want this referendum to tell the SNP that they do not want to a State in their own right and enjoy the benefits of being part of the United Kingdom. So why should we sit back and let the SNP dictate what they think they got elected in for?
Scottish Independence was not a serious issue for the SNP in the 2011 elections, it was however an issue for Labour. Scottish Labour stated they where going to fight against an Independent Scotland, this could be the reason why Labour lost some seats as the Electorate where not concerned on the issue at this time. If people wanted Independence they would vote for SNP on a national level, Westminster, not on a local level. People voted SNP to the Scottish Parliament because they wanted an alternative to Labour and to punish Liberal Democrats. The SNP where the better option as they had great success in their performance in office and they readily engaged with the Scottish People in a way which Labour never did.
Independancy is not economically viable, now yes Scotland have all this Oil, and I do not know how many times I have read 'we have water, we could survive on Hydro'. Well yes it may be viable in 10 or 20 years time when Hydro power is providing closer to 100% of its energy rather than the 20% or so it is now. Maybe then Scotland could be self sufficient, but for now, it could not survive. Off-shore oil is in a steady decline and over the past decade has fluctuated between £5 million and £1 million, this does not pave the way for a solid income. Not only that but it is going to cost over £5000 a year on taxes, over the taxes being paid already. A new Scottish Government is going to be facing between £4.4 billion and £8 billion a year less than what it is currently receiving as part of the United Kingdom.
I don't want an Independent Scotland. Polls show you most likely don't want one. SNP didn't actually campaign for it. I doubt most economists want it, but most importantly, none of the three main parties in Westminster want it. All have stated, in one way or another, that if a referendum came to the table they would all help campaign the 'NO' vote. David Cameron has been very vocal in this and I agree why shouldn't he be. United Kingdom is a very special country, being a 'country of countries' and would lose some of its credibility as this if Scotland were to break away. Yes, for Cameron, it is a point of pride, but what is wrong with that? Giving up Scotland is giving up 500 years of British History!
I do not want to lose out on Scotland, who is going to support us in the tennis now....?
I don't want an Independent Scotland and most likely you are not going to want it either. In a recent survey done, 58% of the people would like a referendum to be held, this sounds promising to any YES campaign, but only on the surface. Only 38% of the people of those people actually want independence with a majority of 54% stating they would rather stay part of the United Kingdom. So it is more likely that people want this referendum to tell the SNP that they do not want to a State in their own right and enjoy the benefits of being part of the United Kingdom. So why should we sit back and let the SNP dictate what they think they got elected in for?
Scottish Independence was not a serious issue for the SNP in the 2011 elections, it was however an issue for Labour. Scottish Labour stated they where going to fight against an Independent Scotland, this could be the reason why Labour lost some seats as the Electorate where not concerned on the issue at this time. If people wanted Independence they would vote for SNP on a national level, Westminster, not on a local level. People voted SNP to the Scottish Parliament because they wanted an alternative to Labour and to punish Liberal Democrats. The SNP where the better option as they had great success in their performance in office and they readily engaged with the Scottish People in a way which Labour never did.
Independancy is not economically viable, now yes Scotland have all this Oil, and I do not know how many times I have read 'we have water, we could survive on Hydro'. Well yes it may be viable in 10 or 20 years time when Hydro power is providing closer to 100% of its energy rather than the 20% or so it is now. Maybe then Scotland could be self sufficient, but for now, it could not survive. Off-shore oil is in a steady decline and over the past decade has fluctuated between £5 million and £1 million, this does not pave the way for a solid income. Not only that but it is going to cost over £5000 a year on taxes, over the taxes being paid already. A new Scottish Government is going to be facing between £4.4 billion and £8 billion a year less than what it is currently receiving as part of the United Kingdom.
I don't want an Independent Scotland. Polls show you most likely don't want one. SNP didn't actually campaign for it. I doubt most economists want it, but most importantly, none of the three main parties in Westminster want it. All have stated, in one way or another, that if a referendum came to the table they would all help campaign the 'NO' vote. David Cameron has been very vocal in this and I agree why shouldn't he be. United Kingdom is a very special country, being a 'country of countries' and would lose some of its credibility as this if Scotland were to break away. Yes, for Cameron, it is a point of pride, but what is wrong with that? Giving up Scotland is giving up 500 years of British History!
I do not want to lose out on Scotland, who is going to support us in the tennis now....?
Saturday, 7 May 2011
One Currency to Rule Them
One currency to rule them all, One currency to find them,
One currency to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the land of Brussels where the shadows lie.
So I am not a big fan of the European Union as you all probably know. There are many reasons why I do not like it, and I shall possibly write a blog about this at some stage. But for now I would like to focus on why Britain should not join the Euro.
The 'LOTR' adapted quote shows one of my main reasons for not wanting to joining the Euro: stability. It may result in an unsustainable economy throughout Europe, and one country may bring down the rest of us. If this does happen and one or two countries then decide to opt back out of the Euro which could tip the balance in any form of Inflation Policies. The UK should be wary that joining the Euro may have its benefits but only during periods of Economic Strengths, which the world in general, and certainly Europe are not experiencing.
Due to a single interest rate, the EU will have to increase payments to countries which have had their debt and interest rates increased, which will reflect badly on the rest of the EU. This happened in Holland where inflation grew by 48%. It will be harder for such countries to sustain a failing currency and Holland would be better off starting a new currency entirely, which brings back to the possibility of them having to leave the Union.
We have handed over most of our political sovereignty to Brussels; why should we give it our financial power as well? Whether or not they would handle it well isn't the case. We are the United Kingdom, we are British, we are a country who is giving all our power over. People in Scotland don't like the Government because there is England; who has been making their laws. So why should we stand for someone in France making the rules for the entire UK?
Finally I simply just cannot be bothered to change currency, I am not very good with maths and the worst thing about going on holidays is the annoyance of constantly having to convert currency. I simply don't like it. I know this last point one is a terrible excuse, but I would be lying if I didn't say it was a factor.
Yes, I know there are many reasons for why the Euro should be introduced, but I hope my arguments effectively counter them. At the end of the day: we cannot implement the Euro at this time anyway for three important reasons.
1) The Maastricht convergence criterion state that our public debt must be below 60% of deficit; below 3% of GPD. Even economic observers state that the Government aims of creating this are optimistic in the short term. (which is, as of March of this year, at 76.1%)
2) We must have spent 2 years in the ERM which Britain have yet to do especially after 'Black Wednesday' in 1992.
3) Public Opinion. There has been little proper coverage to the public about this issue, if the Euro is to be put in place the two main parties who support the Euro state a Referendum must be held. Taking into account the recent Referendum which had just over 50% turn out voter fatigue may play a part which will put back the date of any such referendum.
For now I think we should be happy with Sterling and if the Euro is what we need, then perhaps we should wait, and see if our circumstances become any better.
One currency to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the land of Brussels where the shadows lie.
So I am not a big fan of the European Union as you all probably know. There are many reasons why I do not like it, and I shall possibly write a blog about this at some stage. But for now I would like to focus on why Britain should not join the Euro.
The 'LOTR' adapted quote shows one of my main reasons for not wanting to joining the Euro: stability. It may result in an unsustainable economy throughout Europe, and one country may bring down the rest of us. If this does happen and one or two countries then decide to opt back out of the Euro which could tip the balance in any form of Inflation Policies. The UK should be wary that joining the Euro may have its benefits but only during periods of Economic Strengths, which the world in general, and certainly Europe are not experiencing.
Due to a single interest rate, the EU will have to increase payments to countries which have had their debt and interest rates increased, which will reflect badly on the rest of the EU. This happened in Holland where inflation grew by 48%. It will be harder for such countries to sustain a failing currency and Holland would be better off starting a new currency entirely, which brings back to the possibility of them having to leave the Union.
We have handed over most of our political sovereignty to Brussels; why should we give it our financial power as well? Whether or not they would handle it well isn't the case. We are the United Kingdom, we are British, we are a country who is giving all our power over. People in Scotland don't like the Government because there is England; who has been making their laws. So why should we stand for someone in France making the rules for the entire UK?
Finally I simply just cannot be bothered to change currency, I am not very good with maths and the worst thing about going on holidays is the annoyance of constantly having to convert currency. I simply don't like it. I know this last point one is a terrible excuse, but I would be lying if I didn't say it was a factor.
Yes, I know there are many reasons for why the Euro should be introduced, but I hope my arguments effectively counter them. At the end of the day: we cannot implement the Euro at this time anyway for three important reasons.
1) The Maastricht convergence criterion state that our public debt must be below 60% of deficit; below 3% of GPD. Even economic observers state that the Government aims of creating this are optimistic in the short term. (which is, as of March of this year, at 76.1%)
2) We must have spent 2 years in the ERM which Britain have yet to do especially after 'Black Wednesday' in 1992.
3) Public Opinion. There has been little proper coverage to the public about this issue, if the Euro is to be put in place the two main parties who support the Euro state a Referendum must be held. Taking into account the recent Referendum which had just over 50% turn out voter fatigue may play a part which will put back the date of any such referendum.
For now I think we should be happy with Sterling and if the Euro is what we need, then perhaps we should wait, and see if our circumstances become any better.
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